Lyrics

This one's for you, Mr. Porthouser
Here's another song about your show, woh woh woh
He's so amused, Mr. Porthouser
Kevin laughs when people pass away,
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey

C'mon man what are we doin' out here tell me please
Jaworski's losing games, can't help himself
Reginald's got Bud Grant on his speed dial don'tcha know
Carville still loves the dogs, especially at home

What's that you say, Mr. Porthouser
your neighbor made some wooden bowls for you (breaking news)
God bless you please, Mr. Porthouser
The melting ice will drown us all one day
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey

He'd like to find free parking right beyond the exit door
he'd like to own each house on his street
These aren't secrets they are things he talks about
Like toasting steaks and playing bocce with the kids

How's Gretchen Wu, Mr. Porthouser
She's a superstar now thanks to you, ooh ooh ooh
Here comes the rain, Mr. Porthouser
Michael's turning off his phone today
hey hey hey, hey hey hey

Sitting watching football on a Sunday afternoon
Hey wait, that's it, I'm boiling eggs!
Maybe later see a film and get out halfway through
or maybe buy some new deck shoes

We want you gone, Mr. Papelbon
D.C. fans have had enough of you, ooh ooh ooh
See you next year, Mr. Porthouser
I hope the crew has a nice holiday!
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey

Lyrics/Vocals by Joe Aro
Parody of "MRS. ROBINSON" by Simon & Garfunkel