Lyrics

words by: BillB in Columbus, OH ; Sung by PaulW in Alexandria, MN

Mike from Burke gets his read every day
So does Borzelli from PA
I’ll try to think of something funny to say
To make you read my mail

Who is tall who is sneaky fat
Where do I drive in my Cadillac
I’ll send you pictures of my stupid cat
To make you read my mail

I know you haven’t made your mind up yet
which mail is gonna make the show
Come on Nigel it’s my best one yet
and all those other emails blow

I’d go hungry I’d go black and blue
crawl down Connecticut Avenue
Plagiarise an old Shad haiku
To make you read my mail

Here comes Mr. Tony’s mail bag
got your emails and your notes
Yes it’s Mr. Tony’s mail bag
gonna read some for you folks

I’d help you play golf without a limp
ask Tattaglia if he’s really a pimp
I'll change a monkey into a chimp
To make you read my mail