Lyrics

On a cool September morning, I downloaded the latest podcast
And there I heard the Rambler, talking about the past
And he took turns crushing
All the movies he knew he'd never see
Reading the newspaper
And asking for stuff for free

He said,
"Littles I've made a life, out of yodeling on the TV
I used to do some writing, then Raju Narisetti'd me
Now if you don't mind me saying
And if you mind I'm saying it anyway
Don't you know who I am
Shut up and listen to my advice:"

"You've got to know chimps turn into monkeys (into monkeys)
That Uranus is always funny (always funny)
And if you guard the President, you might wanna lock the door.
You never call the show completed
Until I tell McManus to eat it (eat it jeanie)
And if you hear me reading emails, you know the show is done."

And one of these Summers, they won't renew his contract
Oh, those sonsabitches, the weasels of sales
And shortly after "Do wear white"
The Rambler he'll go quiet
But in his delayed podcasts
We'll have information for life.

Based on "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers