Tony's Mail (Holy Grail)

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A parody of a song by Jay-Z & Justin Timberlake.
A Collaboration by Kj Ohnstad in Minnesota & Jason Fuse in Los Angeles
Recorded: 08/20/2015  Released: 08/21/2015  First aired: unaired

Lyrics

Without the brilliant contribution of the superbly talented Jason Fuse, this jingle would never have come to fruition. HUGE thanks to Jason for agreeing to do this one with me, for a fabulous mix, and for not only rapping but also writing the lyrics for his vocal. You're truly a master of everything, Mr. Fuse!

Lyrics:
When's Mr. Tony coming back? I can't wait now
To hear him ranting bout the Nats and tell Jeanne to eat it.
I still don't know why, why I love it so much. No.
He'll curse a name.
We'll write a song cursing the same .
Or 'bout the soft shells that he eats.
Send him some treats.
Without any shame.
But I still don't know why, why I can't get enough. No.
And maybe,
I am crazy cuz I still make space for you.
Why do I love this stinking show?
Each day you're screaming 'bout nothing new.
Yet you're still raking in the dough.
Crap newscast here
Blown forecast there
Who's lost their hair?
Why do I care?
Littles all across the world waiting for it...
Tony's mail!

Uh, Gary told me to remind you Littles
Uh, I'm coming back for all you Littles
Uh, Out the gate the first of September
Uh, I'll be cuttin' down fools; yelling timber
Uh, the golf course is inviting
But straight cash you know I like it
And look what all that did to Tiger
Lost it all for just a few nights
Of taking bites out of a different slice
All those pancakes for one man
Lead to Thanksgiving fire hydrants
So let's talk Nats and hitting from the tips
Howard and Chris on Trumped up politics,
Did a bear eat Nigel on his Alaska trip?
Been out two months - let's get to it.
Yeah this show is never gonna change
It'll always be the same thing
If you wanna be in, just listen to us
And like Rob said you're "In Da Club"
To use John Hughes as a nexus -
I'm back to eat fools for Breakfast

This show is just entertainment
Full of stupid information
Know this show is just entertainment

And maybe,
I am crazy cuz I still make space for you.
Why do I love this stinking show?
Each day you're screaming 'bout nothing new.
Yet you're still raking in the dough.
Crap newscast here
Blown forecast there
Who's lost their hair?
Why do I care?
Littles all across the world waiting for it...
Tony's mail!

* A parody of Holy Grail by Jay-Z and Justin Timberlake

Comments

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  • judofuse in Atlanta
    haha! My fist is in the air and now I can't move... send help.
    3359 days ago.
  • Brad Weiss in Williamsburg, VA
    *JUDD (where is stupid autocorrect when you eat it) ** NEED it!!
    3361 days ago.
  • Brad Weiss in Williamsburg, VA
    The first indirect Jed Nelson reference. Holy moly!!
    3361 days ago.
  • DRN001 in Chicago
    Awesome! A lock for 9/1 at 11:51?
    3362 days ago.
  • rob in Pittsburgh, PA
    you guys crushed this. i don't think i really need to elaborate.
    3362 days ago.
  • judofuse in Atlanta
    I was 100% in on this immediately upon hearing your verse. Thanks for inviting me on a great idea, and doing a killer vocal. And shout out to Rob for letting me reference his really cool "In Da Club" jingle.
    3363 days ago.