Lyrics

As inspired by Jonathan Conrad

You and me
we might play golf this spring
which is kinda strange
‘cause I never do this kind of thing

You say your kid knows sports
wow, that’s great
don’t say that again
or I’ll punch you in the face

‘cause unless you’re Alan Bubes
I probably won’t talk to you

If you play with me
you might think that you’ll have fun
But don’t you dare make eye contact
with me or with my son

What's for anyway?
is it charity?
I guess it doesn’t matter
as long as my round’s free

And I hope that you’re not hungry
‘cause there’s no way I’m gonna eat with you
and if you’re truly a fan
then you know that’s just who I am

A parody of Hootie & the Blowfish, “Only Wanna Be With You”