[TK's No] Handy Man

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A parody of a song by James Taylor.
Recorded by John Fitzpatrick in Arlington, VA
Recorded: 06/02/2015  Released: 06/02/2015  First aired: unaired

Lyrics

[I’m No] Handy Man

Joshua come on down
What's with this wet stuff trickling down
You fix it, I'm no handy man

I'm not the kind to use the simplest of tools
Snake out the plumbing, who you kidding, fools?
Can't fix broken parts
Hey look! There's a big hole under the can

If your toilet bowl, should need repair
Find a real man, not me
I mutter and moan, complain to my friends
Then summon Croppe-Metcalfe to me-ee-ee

Here is the main thing that I want to say
World's on call to me 24 hours a day
That's the whole point of this show
Hey, are you a fan?

Shout out shout out shout out to Joshua, yeah

Related Songs

All Together Now by John Fitzpatrick
Bile and Rage (Fire and Rain) by John Fitzpatrick
TK Suspended Himself [Yom Kippur edition] by John Fitzpatrick
Handy Man [AKA: The Ballad of Strathmore Garage] by John Fitzpatrick
Your Lawyers Kill The Funny by John Fitzpatrick

Comments

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  • Kj in MN in St. Paul, MN
    Wonderful!
    3437 days ago.
  • judofuse in Atlanta
    "Find a real man, not me" is just great... along with the shout out part at the end.
    3443 days ago.
  • mrlip in Springfield, VA
    Can't fix broken parts Hey look! There's a big hole under the can. That is some hella good writing.
    3444 days ago.