Lyrics

Step one you say you need a box of that
So it begins, your podcast chat....
Can't find your ice cream, man that stinks
the kind you eat over the sink
Safeway's out of cottage cheese tonight
so you drive left, then left, then right
And now you can't find your toothpaste
At CVS, now you're RED-FACED!
You're an old guy yeah you're so orange and bald
No way you're schleppin' to the malls
And you think I'll go public with the things I need
and that's how to get your s**T for free !!!

By Joe Aro
Parody of "HOW TO SAVE A LIFE" by THE FRAY (2005)