Lyrics

Song: to the tune of "Big Yellow Taxi" by Joni Mitchell
Lyrics: Hampton Nager
Performed by: Kjerstin Ohnstad

Re-paving Rockville Pike has made it a parking lot
Stupid Purple Line, now my commute is shot
Don't it always seem to go that you drink up all the scotch til it's gone
And meet Alan Bubas out in the parking lot.

Hey Nigel Nigel, how bout some swag for me?
Forget all the stickers, send a platter of meat and cheese
Please!
Don't it always seem to go that the weasels schnorr the spread til it's gone
Snow shovel time, 'least til the bleeding clots.

Late last night I sent in a great e-mail
But the Bald Orange Head decided my jokes were stale
Don't it always seem to go that some old guy wants me off of his lawn
So here's the mail bag and I hope that you all rot.

[Full props to Kjerstin for a magnificent performance!]