Lyrics

1-877 Smell Like Vlad, SMLL, Smell Like Vlad-
1-877 Smell Like Vlad, You want to be Putin On The Ritz!

COMRADES- let us not beat around the bush- cologne is about attracting the ladies-
(and perhaps masking unsightly odors, but that's for another jingle)

And what man, wouldn't want to smell like the kind of man who-

-fights bears,
-rides horses,
-and when there is a forest fire, he doesn't just grab a hose or an axe, No Siree Sasha-

He jumps right into a plane and drops the water on top of the fire.....

Whew- getting a little verklempt just thinking about it.

So, if you wan the hint of authority with a few notes of conceit and arrogance-

Dial 1-877-Smell Like Vlad and order Leaders Number One right now!

Dose-vee-don-ya Toe-var-eech (Goodbye my friend)