Lyrics

IT WAS NINETEEN NINETY EIGHT IF I ‘M RIGHT,
MAGGIE DRAGGED HOME A CARCASS ONE NIGHT,
IT WAS A ‘POSSUM, THAT APPEARED TO BE QUITE DEAD.
I SCOOPED IT INTO A PLASTIC BAG,
TIED, AND HID IT IN MY NEIGHBORS TRASH,
SINCE HIS CAN WAS WAY BIGGER THAN MINE.

IT CAME TO ME AS I STARTED TO SNOOZE,
THAT “PLAYING ‘POSSUM” IS WHAT CRITTERS DO,
SO I TRUDGED DOWN AND OPENED UP THAT CAN.
SURE ENOUGH, THAT ‘POSSUM WAS OUT,
BUT STILL DIDN’T MOVE WHEN I POKED HIS SNOUT,
SO I TIPPED THE CAN OVER SO HE COULD GET AWAY.

THE NEXT MORNING, THAT ‘POSSUM WAS GONE
AND I FIGURED HE HAD MADE IT HOME,
SO I TOLD MISS MAGGIE, “HERE’S ONE YOU DIDN’T WIN”.
BUT MAGGIE LOOKED TOO CONTENT,
WAGGED HER TAIL AND OFF SHE WENT,
LOOKING BACK JUST ONCE TO GIVE ME A DEVILISH GRIN.

THAT DOG AND I HAD A SPECIAL CONNECTION
AND I KNEW SHE HAD A CERTAIN PENCHANT
FOR EATING STUFF AND THINKING IT WAS FUNNY.
SO I THINK SHE WAS SAYING, I GOT THAT ‘POSSUM
AND IF YOU REALLY WANT TO SEE SOMETHING AWESOME,
JUST SHOW ME THE MONEY TONY, SHOW ME THE MONEY.