Lyrics

LAST WEEK I GOT A RUNNING COACH
HE SUGGESTED I BUY SOME VIBRAMS
5 FINGER SHOES MADE IN CHINA
IT MAKES ME LOOK LIKE I'VE GOT HOBBIT FEET
STEP 2: YOU'VE GOT TO WORK ON YOUR FOOT FREQUENCY
AND HE SAID

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO COUNT YOUR STRIDES
RUN FOR A MINUTE STRAIGHT, IDEALLY
IT'LL BE AROUND 180
IT'S ALL ABOUT LENGTH AND RATE
GET AN APP AND COUNT YOUR MILES
AND TELL EVERYONE HOW MANY YOU SLAYED

NEXT UP LET'S PUMP YOUR V02 MAX
DO A PLANK FIRST THING IN THE MORNING
PUSHUPS WHEN YOUR LUNCH IN BORING
YOU JUST HAVE GOT TO GET YOUR BODY LEAN
AND A FOAM ROLL TO WORK YOUR IT BAND CLEAN
AND HE SAID

YOU NEED A MORE EFFICIENT STRIDE
YOU CAN'T LAND HEEL TO TOE, OH NO
THAT'S A RECIPE FOR SHIN SPLINTS
60 INCHES SOUNDS JUST ABOUT RIGHT
HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT GLUTEN-FREE OATMEAL
WITH COCONUT MILK COFFEE CREAM?