Lyrics

Well I heard your latest podcast
Not sure if I’ll subscribe
‘cause it seems in every segment
there’s only one thing on your mind

In the open it was golf from the weekend
And then next it was golf at Michael’s school
Then you had Nigel call Wendy Rieger on the phone
and somehow talked golf with her, too

I know, it’s your show, you choose the content
but as a listener I have a choice, too
‘cause I’d rather measure Carville at the airport without gloves
than spend one more minute on golf

I know complaining’s pretty pointless
They tell me that’s what the skip button’s for
But I mashed on that icon each time I felt bored
And now I’ve bored out a hole in my phone!!

Oh, so Tony, let me remind you about football
Or baseball or monkeys or hockey or Dear God, anything else!!
'Cause I'd rather take the phone call when your water bill seems too high
Than spend one more minute on golf

I'd rather listen to Chuck Todd toot his horn
Than Michael discuss the placement of a pin
I'd rather stab both of my eardrums with cocktail forks (yeah)
Again and again and again and again and again
Oh, can't you see what I'm tryin' to say, Tony

I’d rather you spend a whole month on brackets
or play “Where In The World Is Luke?”
I’d rather hear Chris Cillizza lose a rap battle to a dog
Than spend one more minute on golf

Yes, I'd rather eat ice cream over the men’s room sink at Chatter
Or listen to Nigel screw up the news
I'd rather clean all the linens after Courtney films a scene
Than spend one more minute on golf

Oh, I'd rather teach myself how to golf then buy a new bag of golf clubs then play a round and shoot 202
than spend one more minute on golf

A parody of “Weird Al” Yankovic, “One More Minute”