Dusty Can't Win

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A parody of a song by Kansas.
Recorded by Claire in Witness Protection
Recorded: 10/20/2017  Released: 10/20/2017  First aired: unaired

Lyrics

I close my eyes, only for a moment
And then Gio's gone
All Nats dreams passed when he brought Scherzer out to pitch relief
Dusty can't win
All we know is Dusty can't win
Same old song, can't win in the clutch
much like that hockey team
All they do crumbles to the ground
Because this is DC
Dusty can't win
All we know is Dusty can't win
Oh, ho, ho
Now, don't hang on, Strasburg went forever, much to our surprise
It slips away, and all your money won't another series buy
He'll get you in
But in the playoffs Dusty can't win
(In the playoffs Dusty can't win)
Dusty can't win
(He'll get you there but he just won't win)
All we know is Dusty can't win
Can't win

SO excited about my first jingle! Many thanks to Elliot Olshansky for the idea, and to Joe Aro for tweaking my lyrics and recording it! ~Claire

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  • Sam Stirlen
    One of the best jingles ever!
    2408 days ago.
  • Brad Weiss in Williamsburg, VA
    Go Claire!
    2558 days ago.
  • Kj Ohnstad in Red Wing, MN
    Nice job outta you two! Way to go, Claire!
    2566 days ago.
  • Claire in Maryland
    Thanks, Anita! This was actually in response to the news that he had been fired, but it just wasn't specifically mentioned in the song.
    2572 days ago.
  • Anonymous Little
    Clahhhsic !!!!!!!!
    2572 days ago.
  • Anita from Alaska
    Welcome to the club Claire. Good job outta you. And Joe crushing as usual. Should have waited an hour and added a getting fired verse.
    2572 days ago.