Lyrics

[Phony Tony:]Alright boys and girls, Today we have with us in the studio Gary Bauer, David Aldridge, and John Feinstein. Ready to sing your song?
[Junior:] I'd say we are
[Aldridge:] Yeah, Lets sing it now!
[Phony Tony:] Okay, Gary??
[Gary:] OK
[Phony Tony:] Okay, David Aldridge???
[Aldridge:] No, Tony
[Phony Tony:] Okay ?...John?...John!! JUNIOR
[Junior:] OK!!

[Chipmooks:]Christmas, Christmas time is near
Time for bowl games time for beer
We can yak, but we can't sing
So we won’t be carolling
Won’t drink egg nog till we puke
[Junior:] I will always pull for Duke
[Chipmooks:]We could stand to lose some weight
So, Christmas, it could wait.

[Phony Tony:] Ok boys and girls, let’s do one for Bagel City, Do you know the Dreidel song, Gary ?,.
[Gary:] Naturally!
[Phony Tony:]David?
[Aldridge:]No. Tony
[Phony Tony:] Uh John,
.John?...John!! JUNIOR
[Junior:] Do you know who I am?!!

On Christmas day we’ll watch the clocks
Time for latkes, time for lox:]
time for dim sum and the flicks,
get a rub-down, have a schvits
Sit around and count our loot
[Junior:] I still always pull for Duke
[Chipmooks:]
We want thirty four inch waists,
This Christmas don't gain weight
If you’re on your bike tonight
On Christmas Please were white